The Axe May Forget (But The Tree Remembers) - Ananya Bhardwaj (Week 15)

Parents don’t remember yelling at their children; bullies don’t remember the torment and torture they inflict. Hunters don’t remember the exact amount of deer they’ve shot, they don’t remember the fawns they’ve orphaned.

The people who hurt you don’t remember doing so; that doesn’t mean they can’t feel remorse, just that they won’t remember the scared look in your eyes or the pain written across their face.


I can recall a plethora of times where I can hear my own heartbeat louder than anything else, where my hands have been shaking, where blood rushes to my ears and tears threaten to spill out of my eyes.


I can’t remember more than a handful of times where the sun seems a bit brighter, where my smile feels natural on my face, when I can take the time to look up at the sky and smile.


No one remembers the pain they inflict, just the pain that they feel.


Source: NicoDelG on Threadless


No guillotine remembers the slices it makes—and it’s not a problem that can be fixed. No one apologizes to every ant they step on. Taking back hurtful words and actions are impossibly difficult; many have described such as being similar to catching the feathers of a ripped pillowcase as they fly in the wind.


Lord of the Flies takes the stance that it is human nature to resort to violence, and that rules are what keep us morally in line. There are a million rules on planet Earth; there are thousands of regulations and restrictions put in place—and yet, nations are marred by abuse and corruption.


You probably don’t remember the one time you said harsh words in an even harsher tone. You don’t remember the time you went ahead, leaving someone alone. You don’t remember the axe you swung, but the tree you hit sure does.

Comments

  1. abdul_muhaiminApril 28, 2025 at 9:30 PM


    Hello Ananya, I loved reading your blog, it reminded me of the cyclical nature of trauma, and how it infects the generations, surviving like a parasite. People always make up explanations to excuse their insensitive behavior, failing to analyze the impact of their imprudent comments and their lasting effects. Humans are primarily social creatures, they cannot live in health and in isolation together. Therefore, death is pertinent when power is spread equally. A very interesting comment I saw, If you have a gun and I have a gun, we can discuss morality, If you have a gun and I have a knife, we can discuss legality, If your have gun and I have nothing, I am but a slave to your will.

    ReplyDelete
  2. Ruhika GoelApril 30, 2025 at 8:13 PM

    Hey Ananya!

    This really hits hard. I love how you have put into words that frustrating, almost invisible wall that exists between people. The impact we have had on other people often fades from our own minds way faster than it does for the person who had to recieve it. The imagery of the ripped pillowcase and trying to catch the feathers perfecty captures the messy feeling of trying to undo hurt. I want to read Lord of the Flies now so I can understand more about all the rules in the world not being enough. I think this is an important thing which seems so obvious, but many people are unaware of it. Everyone should remember the ax-tree analogy.

    ReplyDelete
  3. Alexander NatividadApril 30, 2025 at 8:59 PM

    Hi Ananya,
    I am impressed by how powerful your blog is. Your consistent message that people’s emotions can be hurt although not intended is something that often goes unnoticed in society. I thought the picture of the axe and tree was the best representation of this, most likely because it is a visual. I remember reading Lord of the Flies last year, and I am happy to see that you correlated the themes of the island boys to the blog. Great message and I hope that I can keep determining my possible axes in case of any nearby trees.

    ReplyDelete
  4. Sara SanthoshApril 30, 2025 at 9:18 PM

    Hi Ananya,
    This was such a powerful read. The way you describe the long-term effect of pain with that axe and tree metaphor really struck a chord with me—it's just such a simple image, yet there is so much to it. Your mention of the way in which individuals forget the harm that they cause but the hurt people remember each and every detail caused me to pause and reflect on my own past. The pillowcase-and-feathers comparison was spot on as well—the harm sometimes can't be repaired, no matter how much effort you put in. I enjoyed the correlation you made between Lord of the Flies as well; it's scary how close humans can get to savagery and not even realize.

    ReplyDelete

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Ruhika, Week 16 - Memories Bring Back, Memories Bring Back You

Image
As this is the last blog I will ever write, I wanted to share one memory I will remember with all of the people in my class. AP Lang was a rollercoaster of a class… the amount of stress it caused me is immeasurable. However, I am so grateful that I got this experience since I think this class is the one which has the most tightly connected community. Suhas Bathini: I will not forget how terrible of a dancer you are. I am glad that the Gartic telephone allowed me to become friends with you. Ananya Bhardwaj: Your Michael Jackson impression is amazing. I will need a full length cover. Yuhaendan Bhaskaran: You are a bad mafia, letting your hands give you away.  James Chan: Your stage presence is amazing, which was evident in your POAS. I have had the pleasure of having English with you twice and getting to witness incredible performances more than twice. Devyani Choudhury: You whispering under your breath, “[A 3] is not the same to me,” will always make me giggle. Ritwik Deshpande: I a...
Read more

Michelle Li, 3/19 Week 13 - Person of American Significance

Image
David Koresh, my Person of American Significance. Image source: Financial Times You might have noticed my face turning a little red after my POAS presentation this Monday; I was embarrassed. I genuinely thought my performance was awkward and that my memory lapses were too obvious. But my tablemates and friends quickly reassured me that I did well, which I was grateful for, but didn’t truly believe. I think it’s because I don’t notice how I deliver my speeches. When I’m presenting, I switch into a different mindset where I cut out filler words, enunciate things for emphasis, and use hand gestures. It happens near automatically now through a phenomenon called implicit memory ---a type of long-term memory that causes us to unconsciously recall behavior or skills, typically through repeating these habits in the past. Since delivery has become second nature, I only focus on the content of what I’m speaking about—which I’ll admit was lackluster and cut out important information I wanted to ...
Read more

2025- Abdul Muhaimin-Week 16

Image
  This year might have been the most memorable bout of time in my recent history; even after excluding the mind bending outwardly world events, this year was still filled with the highest highs and lowest lows of my life. This blog seems like a farewell letter, partly because this is, after the end of this year I am leaving American High to join Ohlone Connections . It seems strange how I will not be seeing the wonderful friends I made during APeng, and largely in American High. So as we close this year I ask you to think about some of the memorable parts of this year, some lenses tell a more interesting tale. One lens to view the year through, could be the “WAR AGAINST COLLEGE BOARD.” It started with a training montage where we met are lieutenant, Mrs. Smith,  and as the year progresses so did our skills. Who doesn’t remember the sleepless nights spent doing annotations, or mental connections forged through rhetorical analysis. In the middle of this epic we face off against...
Read more